STOP (the madness)!

Stop the madness. Do you know what I was doing till 1:00am last night? Working on my website, trying to figure out why on earth nobody can find me if they google something simple like ‘Alexandria photographer’. I am not asking to be the first one found, or heck even on the first page. But to be not there at all? This is very frustrating to me. I don’t understand. What if the odd person, living on Fairfax St. in Old Town is looking for a baby photographer? I am right there, a street over, but do they know I exist when they search online? NO. I even have an actual store front now, shouldn’t that help somehow? You would think so!

So of course I dug my heels in and started reading and tweaking things on my website, hoping it will help. Other websites have to link to you, or you need to provide relevant content. I honestly pride myself on fresh, interesting content. I love writing (however terrible it might be at times) and try not to add digital clutter in terms of rubbish content. I don’t want to play this game where I have to ask blogs to link to me so I can get a higher google ranking. I can smell a ‘content rat’ for miles. You know, the blogs and websites that have bad content and you know they are only doing it to be ‘found’ on the internet.

The other day a popular blog wanted to feature some work that I am part of. ‘How wonderful!’ I thought at first. And then I realized they would not pay a penny for this work that I put my heart and soul into. Not just the photographs, but the words, the staying up at 1:00am and working my ass off as a small business. Nope, not a penny. Just a link and photo credit. I suppose the link would send web traffic my way, hence raising my google ranking, leading to people finding me. I suppose.

So now what? The balance between being a creative and a business person is very hard. I loathe to give away my work for nothing and more than anything I am appalled they would even ask. For goodness sake the blog probably makes a six figure income with ads and vendors. Isn’t it bold of them to ask for work and pay nothing? I believe so but sometimes I think I have no idea how this internet thing works. I try and be honest, make connections, network in real life (not just sitting behind a computer), try and raise the bar for all businesses that I can help with, not just mine.

This popped up on KEXINO this morning.. somehow they always find a way to say exactly what I need to hear:

If you’re proud of your work, don’t worry whether everyone loves it. 

If you’re not proud of your work, worry a lot that YOU don’t love it.

This made my heart sing. I am so proud of my work.  I hope people like it but I don’t worry about it if they don’t.

I am sitting here at home, late to the studio because I had to write this down. I am SO bloody proud of my work. I am as authentic as I can be and don’t worry about the bottom line. I don’t make work to look like anyone else or to be popular. I don’t follow trends. My work, my house, my studio, my life, my children.. they follow the same ‘theme’. Simple, clean, uncluttered, kind.

 As I was telling my friend the other day, every single LIKE on my facebook page means the world to me because that means YOU see something in my work and are on my side. You are not there because I am a popular photographer, it is because we connect with each other in some way.

Do you know what touched me to the core? A client emailed me a couple of years ago to book me for a session. At the time she said it was not in her budget but she would get back to me later. Two years later she emails me back saying she has saved up for a session and asking if she book one this summer? Do you know what that means to me? It means everything.

Sorry this is such a jumble of words. I get so frustrated with all this other ‘stuff’ sometimes, google rankings and SEO and all that jazz. Sometimes I just need to tell myself to STOP THE MADNESS and refocus on what is really important. Doing work that I am proud of, working hard, being kind  and building a business one connection and one client at a time. There are no shortcuts, are there?

xo, Rashmi

PS: I have to go to work now, so this my first draft of this post. No time to go back and edit and remove a thousand unnecessary words. Excuse typos and grammatical errors. xo

 

EMAIL ME|SHARE WITH FRIENDS|BACK TO THE TOP

sumedh - Internet shminternet. I think your instincts on the big blog were quite right—if they are making money, why shouldn’t you?

And you might not have an Internet problem. Speaking for myself, I probably wouldn’t search Google for “Alexandria photographer,” because I already know I’m going to get Search Engine Optimised Websites offering Free Insurance Quotes or something like that. I might use Yelp (where I notice you aren’t listed—that’s easy to fix.)

Keep doing the awesome work that you do, write more and let the Internet go optimize itself.

Jan Potter - Do some research on SEO (search engine optimization). I haven’t done websites in a year or two, but there are certainly good ways to make it move up in search engine land.

Letter to my daughters : March 25th 2012

“It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.”

- Albus Dumbledore

Dear girls,

Nowadays I find both of you sailing the (sometimes) treacherous waters of childhood friendships. By instinct you seem to do the right thing, staying away from unnecessary conflict and asserting yourself when it is something you won’t tolerate. I hope you keep doing what you are doing, not accepting rubbish from anyone and being able to mend fences when a friendship goes awry.

Big girl, you have made some new friends this year who really strengthen who you are, a balance to your wild and crazy ways and in turn you balance them out by infusing your enthusiasm for everything into their lives. Little one, you have had your sometimes bossy big sister to deal with all your seven years of life which makes you very well versed in asserting yourself when you are getting overwhelmed. Your maturity astounds me on some days, but we need to work on your empathy a little bit more.

In our culture girls are expected to always be nice, please everybody and make all friendships work. Society tells our girls to try and work it out. We slowly chip away at the instinct and confidence that you are born with, your inner wisdom that let’s you say without malice, ‘I don’t think we can be friends.’  No judgement, just a fact. We simply cannot be friends with everyone. You can tell a good friend from one that doesn’t quite fit by how you are around them. Are you yourself or are you changing yourself like a chameleon to fit in?

There is a season for some friends. Only a few will last you your whole lifetime. Many friends (and people in general) come into our lives to teach us something about ourselves. Maybe how to set boundaries or simply learn about something new and open up our minds. Sometimes, once the lesson is learned, the season has passed and it is time to move on and let go of that friendship. That is okay.

Today it is confusing because it is so much easier to stay in touch with everyone from all stages of your life.. preschool friends, school friends, college friends, work friends, preschool mom friends.. the list goes on and on. So it gets harder to stay in touch with our lifelong friends, the ones you have to actually ring up and talk to.To be honest, I worry about your generation and what your concept of friends will be like. I hope you always have an inner circle of true friends and I hope I have the wisdom to be able to help you navigate the even more treacherous waters of friendship in the years to come.

I want you to remember, that your friends today and many years from now will be lucky to have you in their circle. If you are ever in a situation where somebody else does not want you in their group, trust me, it is their complete and utter loss.

Lastly, you both are so lucky because you will always have the best friend you can ever ask for in your sister. She, more than anyone will be fiercely loyal, always caring and will call you out on any craziness. In between the squabbling I see between the two of you, the greatest joy for me, as a mother, is to see when you two get along and play nicely, and when one of you falters how the other one hurts as well. Two peas in a pod.

Love you more than anything, always and forever,
Your very first friend,

Mummy

____

Please follow the blog circle to the brilliant and talented Emma Wood, living in a manor in the English countryside, an inspiration to me, and a friend with the loveliest heart.

~

I am a professional photographer based in Old Town Alexandria. My studio is on 210 N. Lee St. Alexandria VA 22314. I specialize in baby, children and family photography.

EMAIL ME|SHARE WITH FRIENDS|BACK TO THE TOP

Kirsty - Rashmi, you are so real – a rare find sometimes in this world – you lead by example to your girls and show them kindness will win the day – your words always inspire me as a mother to girls – you say things I want to say too – thank you for being you and for telling not only those two precious girls, but all of us how things really are xx

Debbie Wibowo - Rashmi, I have to agree with Amy. You always have something so right to say. I’ve been enjoying reading your letters as I learn a lot from you about being a mother. You are wise, true, open minded, and has a huge heart. I will definitely continue to share your letter with my daughter as well, as I am certain she can learn a lot from them.

amy grace - you always have something so right on to say. this is so wise, so fitting for all of us. we are all pleasers, and you are right, we are taught to be. i try to teach my kids to move on, to roll with things, to filter, but some days i feel my old, tired roots showing. friendship is magic when it is real. that they have such a beautiful example, in their “mummy”, in each other, is such a lucky head start. rashmi, i love the wonderful person you are with the world, and i love that it is so real, you don’t hide anything, it doesn’t have to be sunny all the time. but it is always so very warm…xoxoxo